Saturday, April 1, 2006

Humor? From Gadling?


Japanese Fans by Carl Parkes

The good folks at Gadling have gone all out today, with some half-dozen hilarious posts in honor of April Fools Day. I sense from these posts, that the fabulously paid Gadling authors are mostly frustrated humor writers, who would rather be working the opening monologue for Conan O'Brien, than ragging on about esoteric travel trivia. Fine work, and too bad this sort of opportunity only comes up once a year.

Fans of our America’s 43rd president will finally have something to rejoice about later this month when the new Bushland presidential theme park opens. Built atop the breeding grounds of the endangered Texas blind salamander, Bushland embraces the life and accomplishments of George W.

This wonderful family getaway has something for all ages; the Michael Moore Harpoon Toss, the Cheney Shooting Range, the Deficit Roller Coaster (which only goes up), and the Karl Rove Spinner (the opening of the Karl Rove Steamboat Cruise has been postponed until problematic leaks are fixed).

Gadling: Bushland to Open

From the same people who have brought you volumes about single topic esoterica, comes the newest, perhaps most important book: Foot Odor: The Complete History.

Author Mark Farklansky, whose books about Flour and Glue revealed the untold stories of these common products, has really outdone himself here with a mesmerizing account of where foot odor came from and its impact on world history.

Gadling: Foot Odor, A History

Pangaea is one of the more difficult places to reach on this planet, but also one of the most rewarding. I was therefore pleased to discover that Old World Travels has just announced a two-week tour of this fascinating region which leaves later this month. An April trip is perfect timing because springtime in Pangaea is indeed wonderful. Plants and animals are slowly blossoming to life and every day seems so very fresh and new. I’ve never been myself, but this is indeed the Old Country from where my ancestors, in one form or another, originally heralded.

Gadling: Springtime in Pangaea

Here's an odd one: The Nepalese government wants to make it easier, much easier, for people to climb towering Mount Everest. Turns out they are planning to build a working, electric escalator that will carry people from base camp to the summit in less than an hour. The engineering effort is being put in the hands of the Japanese, in a serious political snub to the Chinese who had also bid on the project. The proposed escalator will be approximately fifteen miles long and will rise and fall with the jagged gradations of the mountain. It will move approximately five miles an hour and will offer superb views of the surrounding Himalayas. There will be rest stops, as well, built into the structure, that will allow riders to stop for tea or snacks. For children who grow easily bored by gaping mountain vistas, they are planning to offer portable DVD players and a wide selection of films.

Gadling: Nepalese Plan Everescalator

Mark Burnett Productions has just announced a new travel themed reality show to be carried by FOX next season. The concept, tentatively titled Long Pigs, combines the successful themes of two other hit reality shows; Survivor and The Surreal Life. Long Pigs stars a cast of B-level celebrities who have to share a yurt in the barren Gobi desert with a tribe of Korowai cannibals from southeastern Papua for 40 days.

The cast will have to rely on finely honed outdoor skills to survive as the only food provided are salt and pepper, a barrel of wine reduction basting sauce, and a three day’s supply of Fig Newtons (the show is sponsored by the cookie company

Gadling: New Mark Burnett Reality Show

If you enjoy the outdoors and getting back to nature, you’re going to be downright feral over one of the hottest new trends in adventure travel. Forget expensive Gortex and metal ice axes, we’re talking pre-bronze age here. Yes, everyone is abuzz about the new hunter-gatherer parks that are sprouting up around the country, as well as in other parts of the world.

Gadling: Hunter-Gatherer Parks

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